It was pointed out on the radio that a once in 1000 year string of dates is currently upon us from 1-20-21 to 1-29-21 the date is a palindrome. I notice numbers and hadn’t stopped to take a good look at this curiosity. Likely because there have been dates like 01-11-10 which to me is a perfect palindrome. I suspect the entire week is what makes this an especially unusual situation. But it’s no 02-22-20, just saying. That was not only a palindrome but approximately half way between first case and lockdown in Canada due to Covid-19. This is the anniversary, 01-25-20, the day Canada found it’s first case. A whole freaking year, so much has changed, so little has, all in the same breath. My life certainly has, the number one best thing about it is the redefining and appreciation for or letting go of relationships. Even Facebook has changed, people who have never been on it before have found themselves reaching out and reconnecting, lines have been drawn between the rational and the tin hats, connections kept us sane and drove us crazy at the same time.
I have watched relationships grow closer, strain to the point of breaking or shatter into a million pieces. I myself flit back and forth between thriving outrageously solo and desperately wanting someone to snuggle. A good snog and a deep kiss could make the world go away some days. And then I see the struggling relationships and ache for the pressure they must be under. I want to avoid anyone struggling right now as I am walking on a tightrope and my chin is up, my wings are fluttering, I don’t want to misstep. As an empath, I can trip over someone else’s feeling more easily than my own. I struggle with self protection when my nature is to try to express what I sense in a way that will help the other person. In doing so though it can do me damage and I feel as though I am coming up to a nice place right now. I am going to hold on to that.
These are some of the things that rattle around in my head after I post a check in, shopping list of how my day was. I resent that I have to sensor so as not to be gossipy or hurtful. I can’t just say everything to let it all out. But I can wait a bit and digest it and discuss in more general ways so no one gets hurt.
There have been so many positives this past week including my client/friend who asked if I would do dry February with her and I was hoping for a buddy to do so. I also asked another friend to join in as I worry about her health. It will be good for all of us. I don’t think it will be easy as I am in the habit of enjoying a bevie, but it will be healthy and will break the habit. I am going to get on the treadmill again as well. I am going to do things that make me happy, like puzzles and crafts.
And I am going to wear the shoes.
triumphgal 