12-04-21 I am trying
I fulfilled my obligations today, outside the house. I only cried three times, outside the house. I chitchatted with strangers, outside the house. I faked a smile, outside the house.
I had an honest conversation fraught with strong emotions, outside the house. I had a meaningful conversation with a friend in passing, outside the house.
From inside my cocoon, I invited a friend over tomorrow to celebrate her birthday, i got rid of the grey. I let another friend vent via text, I made food and tried to eat it. Looks like lunch is leftovers tomorrow. I pieced away at my puzzle and tried not to think about the show or work.
I took pleasure in the beauty of the snow and the return of Dexter
Depression takes on a physicality in me that I have been trying to ignore for weeks. The overwhelming tiredness, walking through sand feeling, the insomnia and the swelling of my throat. The sadness literally chokes me. My higher brain screams, SNAP OUT OF IT. My lower one is not ready to yet.
triumphgal 