11-09-22 where there’s a Will, there’s a Worry
Note: I had to sit with all my emotions for a while tonight before blogging. This was a very hard day. I finally decided just to write what comes to me and let it out.
Parenting is Fucking Hard! It is hard for the parent and hard for the parent of the parent. At 11:21 this morning, as I was taking my co-worker’s order and planning to go pick us up lunch at Arby’s, our family chat group got a message from Rae-Anne that Will, her soon to be 11 year old had had a bad reaction to his immunization and was going to be brought to the hospital by ambulance. She was already there in the parking lot waiting for it to arrive. He was admitted and well cared for and Roger was soon there as well. I was shocked as we all were and the rest of the day was a stream of texts and tears. I picked up Sawyer from school at 3 and brought him back to the office to have snacks and watch Netflix while we waited. I texted R-A and asked if it was the HPV vaccine and promptly researched it on the CDC site. I then asked what the symptoms were and shortly after my phone rang. It was Will and he sounded so tired and sad. He told me that he got his shot and then went to sit with his group as he was supposed to but started to feel dizzy and when they helped him lay down he started to have trouble breathing. They did use an épi-pen on him and called for an ambulance thank goodness. I found out later that the ambulance took a long time and that his lips were going blue etc. They had to basically lockdown the school so the kids didn’t go outside and be scared by the ambulance. Poor Sawyer was curious why he couldn’t go out and asked his teacher but they couldn’t tell him until it was cleared with his parents. He was then given good explanations and reassured but he was still very worried when I picked him up. The Principal was amazing and even rode in the ambulance with him and found her own way back to the school. I can’t even imagine the trauma for everyone who still had to get their shots in the rest of the day. Will was in the hospital for nearly 6 hours being medicated and monitored. He is to see his Dr and or an allergist to get to the bottom of it. He would normally get a booster in 6 months but I am guessing that is a big NO. It is so odd that neither of his older brothers had a reaction, and it is such an important immunization against some pretty scary cancers. It was such a relief to see him when they came to get Sawyer. So much worse case thinking going on, such a need to focus on the positive. I am so grateful to the love from those in the workspace, the freaking amazing hug from Keri when I thought I was going to blow apart from fear.
So yeah, parenting… the choice to forever have a part of your heart walking around outside your body.
My heart is with all three of my kids, my 5 grandkids (and the two bonus ones) and all the other next generations in my life. It is sure to not get any easier as the years go by but the image that keeps haunting me was the look in my daughter’s eyes when they came back from the hospital. I am afraid for her, it has all just been too much.
On the upside, they took out his stitches while he was there that were put in only 13 days ago, when he last visited the ER.
triumphgal 