06-03-26 Refloat the Boat
The bottom line is, if you are following the instincts, the universe is giving you when you must welcome the path the universe is putting you on.
It’s simple really. I was completely overwhelmed by my visit with Mom tonight. I arrive there as she was having some kind of reaction with very flushed cheeks said she was boiling hot and her hands were shaking, and she had a massive cramp in her thigh. She had pushed the button, but no one responded for a very long time. As it happens, the doctor came by and checked her out and they are going to watch her for fever because she has tenderness in her abdomen again and although she is on antibiotics for a UTI, it could be appendicitis flaring up again. It’s just me selfishly, saying at the moment that it is too hard to sit there and not be able to take any of this away for her. I helped her through getting her food cut up so that she could eat some of her dinner and she was unable to tell me the correct day her full, correct address or my birthdate. In all cases, it was close, but not close enough, and I fear for her baseline.
I laughed, heading home, feeling overwhelmed and sad, but my car automatically took me to wing night at F&B. Turns out that is exactly what the universe had in store for me. Two people that I knew were already sitting at the bar, and I met an amazing lady sitting beside me who was substantially older than me from whales, and she immediately sparked up a conversation about whiskey and Edinburgh. I enjoyed meeting Lynne. Bejea and Jake were equally supportive in the conversations that we had they didn’t all just dwell on my sad, but they lifted me out of it.
It’s hard because I shouldn’t be spending any money at all right now. I have lost too much wages with the time I’ve spent with mom‘s appointments in mind this past couple months. I have to realize, though that self-care comes in many forms and being there this evening getting many good hugs was exactly what the universe ordered.
triumphgal 